Motherhood

The hardest part about being a mother is not loving or caring for the little ones. Speaking for myself, it is the very act (or attempt) of holding back my own frustration, helplessness and wrath when my children are feeling the same emotions. The challenge is to NOT duplicate them; children display their feelings with rawness only children are capable of showing. They yell, cry, threat, kick, pull, push, etc (great if yours don’t, mine do). After many successful and failed experiments (motherhood is nothing but a marathon of experiments), I have tried to be a textbook/advertisement-worthy mom. To.no.avail. My kids still detest vegetable. But I see that they are not crazy about candy and chocolates anyway. So I give in to chicken nuggets and other bad processed food that they like. Peace in the house, I don’t feel great but I don’t feel like a nazi mom either. Motherhood requires a lot of faith. You don’t know if what you’re doing is the best thing for them, but you pray that it is good enough. Motherhood is complex, you swear to yourself that you are not going to be like your mother but that is exactly who you are today. then you look in the mirror and vow that you would do it differently but at the same time ask yourself why is it that your mom is so much nicer now, more patient with your children? I don’t have the answers, of course. I just do it – I just make sure they get fed, enough sleep, be in school on time, wear the right thing on the right day (between 2 boys and PE/gym/music/swimming/karate), they get some TLC from me (although the boys squirm and wipe their cheeks every time) and their ipod and ipad are fully charged when they wake up.

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Published by: mizrae

I am not always nice, but I can be. I like reading more than writing, and I wish I write better than I do. I hope that I listen more than I speak because honestly, that's the kind of people I am drawn to.

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